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Knob Goblin Elite Guardsman

You’ve been attacked by an Elite Guardsman, among the fiercest and most loyal of the Goblin King’s Guards. He’s so bug his plate‐mail is actually platter‐mail.

He gets the jump on you and swings his mighty polearm in a whooshing arc, catching you square in the nipple. Ouch! Oof! Ow!

You concentrate your starchy magic and call forth a Minor Ray of Gene. The Guardsman staggers and looks confused, then walks into a wall. Looks like he was too educated stupid to avoid it.

You win the fight!

The other Knob Goblins cower after you defeat one of their own, so you’re free to search the Treasury. It doesn’t look like the Plot Device is here. Great, now what are you gonna do?